Summer is often seen as a season of warmth, joy and light. With family barbecues, weddings and graduations, summer can be the season to celebrate for many people. But for people experiencing grief or loss, the contrast between external celebrations and internal sadness can feel overwhelming. Grief doesn’t take a vacation, and for many, summer becomes the season of visible joy and invisible pain.
Why Summer Can Be Especially Hard For Those Experiencing Grief and Loss
Grief can intensify when routines are broken, like when special occasions arrive. These moments can highlight the absence of a loved one in painful ways. A few common scenarios that may trigger a strong emotional response include:
- Vacations or holidays – Times that once meant spending time together with loved ones can seem lonely
- Graduations or Milestone Events – Occasions that a loved one did not get to witness can be very difficult to navigate emotionally
- Weddings or Engagement Parties – Summer is a popular time for couples to celebrate, but can be bittersweet if a loved one cannot participate and serves as a reminder for what was lost
Strategies for Coping With Grief This Season
Grieving during this season of celebrations is incredibly personal, but there are ways of approaching it to prioritize your healing and emotional safety.
- Set Boundaries – Give yourself permission to excuse yourself from events that feel overwhelming. You do not have to attend every event, or any event if you do not feel up to it. Choose what you feel is manageable and respectfully turn down the rest.
- Plan Ahead for Emotional Moments – If you know a certain event will be tough, try to plan around it. This could look like taking some quiet time for a morning walk, a therapy session or a self care routine to help you stay grounded. This can help give you a sense of control during a time that may feel unpredictable.
- Create New Traditions – recreating old traditions can feel painful because they may not be the same anymore. Consider creating new traditions that honor your loss in a gentle way. This could look like meeting in a special, meaningful location or donating to a cause that your loved one cared about.
- Seek Out Support Systems – Whether it is a family member, friend or a therapist, having someone to talk to can make a world of difference. Speaking about your grief with someone you trust and understands your pain can remind you that you are not alone.
Navigating Summer Holidays While Coping With Grief
Let’s imagine someone named Jackie, who recently lost her father in the spring. Every 4th of July, her family hosted a big cookout, where friends, family, and neighbors would gather by the pool and her dad would make his famous cheeseburgers. As July approached, Jackie felt her grief weighing heavy on her. She didn’t know whether to follow through with the family tradition or to cancel it. After speaking with her siblings, Jackie decided to host the 4th of July celebrations, but in a different way. Instead of inviting a huge group of people, she invited a few close relatives and friends. Instead of trying to recreate her dad’s famous burgers, they all made a new recipe together to create a new family tradition. Before they ate dinner, everyone took a moment to share their favorite memory of Jackie’s dad. This was in no way the same 4th of July as previous years. Jackie knew the 4th of July would never be the same again. But by adding new traditions and sharing stories with loved ones, it was a step forward in Jackie’s healing journey.
You Are Not Alone
If you are navigating grief this summer, remember that it is okay to feel like you are not in sync with the world around you. It is okay to take your time and to celebrate in your own way. There is no “right way” to grieve, but there are steps that you can take to care for yourself as these feelings arise. And if your grief begins to feel so heavy that you can’t carry it alone and starts to interfere with your daily life, consider reaching out to a mental health professional for support. Therapy or counseling can provide the tools and space you need to move forward at your own pace. If you’re interested in seeing board-certified medical professionals at no cost, signing up for a clinical trial with the Lehigh Center for Clinical Research might be the right choice for you.
